We knew this is going to happen and we are already prepared for it. I have prayed for him but I guess the time had came. Hais. My paternal grandfather died today at 3.30pm :( , leaving me with no more grandfathers. (although he is not really close to me) Hais... Actually, can say is quite a painful death, cos he had kidney failure,heart problems, difficulties,etc,etc and the doctor had already told us that he is already hopeless when I visited him on thurs.
Okay heres whats going on down at my grandpa's place right now as I am blogging. All my relatives are now down there dressed in "Toi Toi Coil" uniforms and burning incense paper except me. (I am at my maternal grandma's place in CCK ) Okay la... tml early in the morning, I am going already. But no matter what, because of god's sake, I will NOT do anything regarding the ritual or wear their ritual uniform or burn any incence paper. I know what I am doing and my sole purpose.
Sien sia... I am the only christian among all my family and relatives. I know it would be hard on me if they do scold but I have my stand. For christ! Amen!
now recapping... today... bla bla..
Today :)
Sunday church as per normal :) hehe... Actually I enjoy gng to church la.. hahax... Love the praise n worship. :P Hahax.. After church we went to vivo to eat then we went to harbourfront centre to pei them study and after that we sat down at mac to chit chat. hahax... Super nice sia... I really enjoy going out with church buddies ! :) hehes!
Then after that at night, I went to Boon Keng to exchange my badminton racket. Thank god the nice shop keeper called me to tell me there is a minor problem with the racket as that shipment got a bit of prob :) Then after that,I took bus to Hougang to return my book. Actually "she" suggested to help me return de, haha ... but because I also shun bian then dun mafan her bah :P Hahax... She got that intention to help me when I need help, I am already feeling very happy and blessed already, just what more would I ask for :) Hehe
Okay bahz.. I think I better prepare to rest already! Tmr I would have the whole day sitting down at the table at the funeral eating peanuts liao... :( Better rest...
losing my grip. [11:27 PM]
Sometimes, I just wonder what I should do or react towards certain things.
Love works only if both parties love each other for who they are and not because of just trying to love someone back just because that person love u a lot. It wont work at all.
Today, one of my friend told me that she is going out with some guy and that guy is like having feelings for her but she does have any for him. That reminds me about how I am feeling towards someone else. I do love someone, but dun know whether she love me back or not. I think I would feel most blessed if ever the person whom I love also love me back as much :) I think this would be my greatest blessing in life and it would make my life very very meaningful and interesting.
I am no longer to be like last time, I dun want to love someone who had no feeling for me. I dun want to fall in love alone because I had such bad experiences before and I dont want history to repeat itself again! I wont accept someone who loves me but I dun like and similarly, I dun want people to agree to be my partner just because I love her. Single sided love is very miserable. And I dun want it to happen again!
Whenever I think about this everytime, it really makes me feel really bad. I want to do more things for her but I dun know what to do as I dun know she love me or not. I am not someone who can take love that easily and just for fun. Because I live life to love and be loved both by god and my partner and thus, I take love very seriously. I dun want to go into a relationship again with no idea whether my partner also love me back or not.
So far only two people know who I am referring to... haha.. Siew Choo is the smartest sia. Straight away guess correct sia.. Since its correct I also dun want to lie to her... hahax... So I told her the truth.
I already know what I want in my life. :) I just need god's grace to be with me ... So close yet so far.
losing my grip. [10:47 PM]
Whew
Today was a very happy day but also a very stressful day for me especially during the TP test. Haha. Will elaborate more below :)
TP Test Experience
You know how much I was worried about today's test since yesterday night when I reached home. I only managed to sleep for like 2 hours from 1am to 3am despite me forcing myself to sleep. Then I was awake throughout. Very worried and praying to the lord for my test results.
Eventually when I came to BBDC for warm up at 7.30am, its still okay because I wasnt nervous in front of the instructor.
But...
When its test time, I realised that my instructor is a bit fierce. Opps. I was thinking.. this time siao liao. How ah? Would I need to have a retest? How long can I wait to get my licence? How much extra money should I spend on a retest. I was extra careful when I was in the circuit and thank god I managed to complete all the circuit courses including the two types of parking smoothly. But at one point in the circuit, I was told to turn left into the main road then turn right. But I didnt notice its one way traffic so I remained in the left lane till I saw the sign.. OPPS! minus 4 point for using wrong lane. Cos I thought it is a two way road. But its a 2-lane one way road and I still kept left so I bo pian have to turn right using the left lane. So I was worried and very demoralised. But thank god everything else is okay for circuit.
Ok after that we went out to do main road driving. Forgot which test route number but its from BBDC to teck whye and back. No slopes but there is heavy lane-changing and U-turn. It was all okay until I reached the 3-lane heavy traffic road. I was supposed to keeep to the left most lane when I turn in through the right lane. So I began to change lane slowly and cautiously! I Signalled and began my lane change! "Tick Tock Tick Tock Tick Tock Tick Tock!" It took me quite a while to lane change but I still managed. After I was in the left most lane , "Tick Tock Tick Tock Tick Tock Tick Tock" ... "switch off your hazard light!" .. I replied "Huh!?!?" Then the voice came again : "SWITCH OFF THE HAZARD LIGHT!" Then I replied "okay okay... sorry :( " I guessed I was so nervous till my heart also caught the rhythm of the hazard light sound and also go "Tick Tock Tick Tock" with it . This time I was thinking.. Opps! 2 mistakes already! I was still okay when I went for the warm up leh but why am I like that? My left leg with the clutch pedal was shivering non-stop all the while whenever I reached a corner .
Why am I so nervous. At that point of time I wished god would take over my body and drive so it would be more perfect.
I proceeded on.. Keep thinking of the mistakes I have made and glancing into the Tester's laptop to try to figure out what he is trying to input into the system. It all went on smoothly again until I reached the left-turn Junction followed a U-turn shortly after it. After I turned left, I was supposed to keep right and enter into the filter lane for U turn. But then the traffic was a bit heave and after I turned left, the car behind be turned into the right lane straight and dun want to give way to me to turn right, wanting to overtake me. I didnt had much time to think and I just qickly switched over to third gear and acceralte as fast as I could to overtake him. But I got check blind spot before I moved in luh! Then the voice came : "Waa very near leh ! " I was super nervous liao. abrupt lane changing ! OPPS ! Summore after I enter the filter lane, the speed of my car was a bit too fast because I had to move fast to cut over because the person behind dun want to give way!
I was already very nervous so I kept asking.. "Can I still pass?" Then worse still.. the reply came was : "Concentrate on your driving first!" I thought this time die liao. Will I pass or not?
After I reached back to BBDC , I asked again:"Erm... So I pass or not?" ... The reply is :"Wait for me at the second floor" Wah... Super worried liao.. Would I fail? Summore even worse. Some people beside me are not getting their licence! Then I was thinking how ah how ah. Every second was painful to me and I longed to see my results
When the results finally came, My grade --> 8 demerit points --> 4 for abrupt lane change and another 4 for using wrong lane for turning in the circuit because of the one way road. The "tick tock" case was waived. Whew. I passed!
Then when I think back. Actually, god had really blessed me with a lenient tester. :) Hehes. Though Jesus, everything can be made possible! :)
losing my grip. [4:11 PM]
Hais... How I wished I could. How I wished I can.. How I wished I had .... How I wished... :(
losing my grip. [12:41 AM]
Today is the day where eventually i got to stay at home throughout the day. It had not been like this for a few months where I go out every single day. It isnt nice at all. because it is super boring. Hais.. How I wished my life would change to be more interesting and less boring. Hahax.
Today
I woke up at 1.30pm because I slept only at 5am the previous day, chionging dota.. :P Hahax.. After having my lunch, I practiced about 6 bars of grade 2 sight reading. Sight reading is still ok luh.. hahax... Just need to practice more :) hahax.. Not going to take my piano test so soon cos I wasnt really fully prepared for it. Hahax. I practiced a bit of guitar chords also... F major is hard on guitar... hahax... :P
Just longing for wednesday to come. Then can go out with cg le :) hehes
losing my grip. [5:36 PM]
Today! :)
Heh! came back after a tiring but enjoyable day out with Keith, John , Grace , Angeline and Johnathan! Woohoo! Firstly, we met up at Woodlands MRT and then we took a bus down to grace house there to meet her and go to the gym.
Actually Hor, we planned to walk over there de cos johnathan liao seems to have gone there b4 but in the end we got lost and went up and down the escalator leading to the Woodlands bus interchange like 3 times. John and I were like racing up and down the stairs with keith cos the escalator wasnt on! Lols.. thats our gym warm up already! Fun siah .. But then sadly to say john injured his leg when he was climbing the stairs cos he was wearing slippers and that the escalator steps are sharp.. the whole skin peel off his leg siah ... like 2 cm square area of skin siah.. should be very painful for him... :(
Then after we went for gym, wewent to hawker to eat.. Keith,John and Angeline ate Botak Jones while Grace , Johnathan and I went to eat chicken rice cos its cheaper
Wahahahax... Then we went to play Lan.. 2 hours --> 1 hour CS and second hour L4D..
CS is fun cos I own! Wahahahax! L4D is a bit sien sien cos not enough peeps for the human part and the group who became human always lose... Hahax... Overall,its still very enjoyable and fun but sad to say, during my second hour of lan, I got stomachache and in the end I endured it all the way till we walked back to causeway and I relieved myself ... And thanks to the rest for waiting for me although I asked u all not to :) Hehes!
Overall today was a very very very fun day and I am very happy :) Hehes I think it would be even more fun if Lily and Ruixin came :) Wahahahax! Too bad they r busy... perhaps next time bahz! :P
Now ~~ :)
Now I feel like playing dota eh! :( but lazy to bring my lappy out to my living room table cos my room table in my room (at my grandma house) is clogged up with my stuff. Tmr I would be having Bible study with Ruixin, Derek and Lily and after which, we would be going to be celebrating Naixin's belated bday :) Hahax...
Lord I just thank you for this wonderful day out! :) I know you love us and will always prepare the best for us! No matter whatever thing I would face in life be it good or bad, I would just thank you for everything because I know that bad things are learning experiences prepared by you to help add value to our lives and good things are the rewarding gifts that you, as our spritual father would grant us when we really do cherish what we have! Through you, nothing is impossible! You have taught us to love people just like how you have loved us! And I would like to pray this in Jesus' holy name! AMEN!
losing my grip. [11:50 PM]
Recounting time! Haiya! Long time no blog.. Cos keep going out and thus, busy playing lan..
Recounts :)
-Last fri --> Went to Hougang gym with Ruixin :) Enjoyed myself but realised that I have lots to do before my army
-Last sat --> In church as usual
-Last sunday --> Went out with john , Keith and some other church pple to help John with his O lvl maths.. Then eat at food court beside Vivo and MRTed home at night
Monday --> Pei Jerry go buy button shirt at Bugis (For his ITP) ... Shun bian go Sim Lim buy another 2gb ram for my lappy (total 4 gb now) Then we went to Parklane to play Lan for 2.5 hrs... Spent $4 on Lan
Tuesday --> Lan with Jerry again. Also in parklane but different Lan shop Played warcraft for 4 hours and spent 5 dollars on Lan.
Today --> Piano lesson as usual. Then eat chicken rice at Simei and then meet Jerry and go Parklane and Laned again! Same shop as tuesday 4 hours --> 5 dollars.. Then after laning , we went upstairs to eat and found 1 lan shop even cheaper --> 50 cents/he promotion! wth! Should have played there instead la... if play there onli $2 for 4 hours. We played Warcraft RPG ... quite fun... :)
Other Stuff
Busy eh! Hahax... but fun la... Haiyo ... I suddenly realised that there are so many stuff for me to practise eh... Just practised piano for an hour before I on my comp and blog eh. I gonna start practising until I can reach grade 2 ABRSM piano standard so that I can go for the exam... Btw, I would be having driving test next week. May god be with me in whatever I do! Amen! Oh ya! And tmr, we would be gng for gym ,lan and eat again... but this time with john, keith ,grace and other church peeps... :) Lan again 0.o ... Tis time is L4D I think.... heh! I think none of my Cell grp peeps can go siah... Awww... Nvm... Still got friday Bible study and hangout to celebrate Naixin Bday :) Hehes... Looking 4ward :)
losing my grip. [9:49 PM]
*My Name : Goh Chang Hua
*Birthdate : 15 May 1990
*School : Singapore Polytechnic
*Email : changhua90.08@ichat.sp.edu.sg
.:. Loves .:.
*The lord my saviour!
*People who possess good attitude
*Playing interesting computer/console games
.:. Hates .:.
*Smokers
*Betrayers
*Freeloaders in project groups
*Being Alone especially at home
.:. Memory Lane .:.
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
.:. Links .:.
*Benjamin Tan
*BiSi
*Cecelia Tay
*Cher Ying
*Daryl Ho
*Ivy tio
*Joannie
*Lim Waiyu
*Melvin Lee
*Melvin Tsang
*NaiXin
*Qiyun
*RuiXin
*Serene Ng
*Tan HuiLing
.:. Credits .:.
About ChangHua
- 90 percent Melancholic and 10 percent Phlegmatic.
- I stay out of bad company
- I choose my friends
- Very reflective and thus very emotional
- A little indecisive at times
- Perfectionist
- Introvert
Welcome to Changhua's Blog.
:).
